Last weeks accidental update hid a payload of future shocks. Maybe
This is your instant messenger on drugs....
Winchester, pint, blow over etc
Things happen on a graph and we write words about them happening
String up the bunting! Light the beacons!
First devices based on the Snapdragon 835 Mobile PC Platform will launch in Q4
But we have a feeling Redmond won't take it on the chin
Everyone's a critic, of course
We'll leave you to make the obvious joke...
So we're trusting that with a ten-foot bargepole, aren't we?
iMac clone will start shipping on 15 June
There's top-brand pricing here, before the Western market is ready for them
'Ah - yes - we're ignoring your wishes for a reason there, leave it alone'
Just 15 per cent of infected PCs were running Windows XP
New model also packs 16GB RAM, upto 1TB PCIe SSD
The top 10 stories from the past seven days
Decryption tool is available to download now on GitHub
Kaby Lake-powered Windows 10 laptop will debut next week
'We know we said UWPs, but it's not all UWPs'
Researcher warns that flaw poses a 'significant threat' to large companies
An illustrated guide to why we slag them off on an almost daily basis
Dammit Jim, we're talking about human lives!
Yes, the same Microsoft that gave the NSA access to Skype
'Accidental hero' stumbles across kill switch in ransomware code
Firm also announces iTunes and Ubuntu for the Windows Store. Wait... what?
Microsoft's heavy-handed Windows Store policy will see third-party browsers binned
Microsoft's one billion target remains a long way off
Company plays catch-up with latest Patch Tuesday bug fix haul
Google's Project Zero shames bug as 'worst in recent memory'
You suck. They suck. Everyone sucks in the end
Fuels speculation of Surface Book 2, Pro 5 arrival
Patent application suggests Microsoft is exploring a third Windows Hello mechanism
Firm is taking the fight to Google with cheap MacBook lookalike
But Azure, Office and Xbox businesses are up
Platform will blend physical and digital worlds to produce new environment
We fondle Acer's Core i7-powered Surface Pro competitor
Two new models look suspiciously like the Surface Pro 4
You couldn't (be bothered to) make this sort of stuff up
Driver issues mean you could bork your machine
Someone is very excited, as you can imagine...
Firm rejoins the wearables race, sort of
Update Tuesday is dead, long live boo boo Tuesday
The top 10 stories from the last seven days
We just wish they didn't have to be such marketing-jargon douches about it
Chipmaker confirms that 'cellular PCs' will debut in the fourth quarter
Because the naming committee were busy that day