Or 'why INQ journalists are still slightly better than robots'
Yeah. The small furry kind. Really.
But firm will also employ more staffers to keep computers in check
While human moderators will make sure algorithms don't mess up
'I'll give you five likes for one defenstrated sheep'
Why have one AI when you can have a Pac of 150?
He's always cooking up something
For some reason
Israeli firm software reduces security threat response times 'by 95 per cent'
A van gets its man
Because of course it is
iOS 11, iMac Pro, HomePod speaker and more
'Breakthrough home speaker' features A8 processor and spatial awareness
Firm also talks up redesigned App Store and ARKit dev tool
We round up the rumours ahead of dev event kick off
Bixby just can't covfefe yet
But Amazon Echo rival apparently won't start shipping until later in the year
It's like a black nanobot in your Chardonnay
We'd like three tickets to Blaster With Man Dreads, please
We are still waiting for it to take up our arm wrestle challenge
Where we're going we don't need humans
Unless you want to cover your living room with Gray Pubic
Theresa and Jeremy show that leaders are robots anyway
Your move Nvidia...
In America, at least
No need to worry just yet Siri
We round up the likely announcements ahead of the keynote's 6pm kick off
Lifesaving AI risks being muddied by WannaCry panic
HTC is hoping its latest flagship will squeeze the competition
Three out of four people are OK with us
Because it went so well for Google ...
And it's worth $3bn, but not really
Controversial HART system will go live in two to three months
The house that VR built
Expensive gadget is available to pre-order, but only in the US
Demand is off the chart. Couldn't Nvidia have predicted that?
Take that, Phil Schiller
Hints that Apple's upcoming device will be better, obviously
Makes it possible to control a Raspberry Pi 3 in a similar way to the Amazon Echo
And oh yeah, the company has been taken over
Apple HomeKit and Siri's hero product may be announced in June
Blah blah, kill all humans, blah blah
Open to Phoenix residents with plenty of spare trousers
This has an air of 'again?' about it
Keep movin' fella
The top 10 stories from the last seven days