AMAZON ALREADY HAS a pretty good idea of how you're feeling, thanks to your order history. Purchasing the complete Saved by the Bell DVD box set at 3am, for example, isn't a sign that your life is going exactly as planned.
But now the company has plans for something a little more immediate, if a report from Bloomberg is to be believed.
According to internal documents and first-hand testimony, the site reports that Amazon's Lab126 hardware division is working on some wearable technology that can read human emotions. And at least some of this functionality will come via embedded microphones that can "discern the wearer's emotional state from the sound of his or her voice."
To be fair, Amazon has probably got pretty good at hearing when people are exasperated given how useless Alexa frequently is. The report goes on to add that "eventually the technology could be able to advise the wearer how to interact more effectively with others," which is pretty bloody rich, given Alex's current catchphrase is "hmmm, I don't know that one."
Lab126 has form developing hardware for Amazon: some successful (Echo, Kindle), others less so (poor old Fire Phone), but this feels a bit of a stretch at the moment. Indeed the Bloomberg report doesn't seem super confident adding that it's unclear "if it will ever become a commercial device."
While there are certain biological markers that could be read to help estimate mood, it still feels a bit far fetched to us at the moment. Stick to consulting a magic eight ball for making all your life decisions, if you really must outsource choice.
Better still, trust your instincts - unless that opening paragraph perfectly described you, in which case don't. µ
Put a Ring-Con on it
We know. We're as surprised as you are
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