SOCIAL DUMPSTER FIRE Facebook has announced plans to own you in death as it does in life.
A new 'Tributes' section has been added to accounts, which will allow users to see your content after you've passed, providing your 'legacy contact' (what? you've not set yours up yet?) lets them know.
Once the contact has been granted as taking over the tribute page, they'll be able to change your cover photo, profile pic and (here's the really creepy bit) share a final message on your behalf.
Perhaps like "he wanted you to know he hated you all anyway".
Your legacy contact will be able to moderate your page, so if anyone leaves a tribute about how you still owed them a tenner, or that you have a face like a barrage balloon, they can step in on the grounds of decency and hide it.
Doubtless, Facebook will still make a note and try to find a way to monetise your barrage-balloon face, of course.
All this is really doing is making a formal process out of an activity that has been at the heart of Facebook since the beginning.
What it might do, however, is stem the long-standing issue of being invited to "friend" a corpse your friends knew, be constantly reminded that they were halfway through Candy Crush Saga, or have pictures of them show up unexpectedly as "on this day" memories, when it's the last thing you want because it's too upsetting.
Death is one of the last places to hide from social media, but there's no indication that Facebook will do anything as sensitive as turning off the adverts of memorial pages, so this seemingly generous gesture is essentially just another income stream.
At the moment the feature is rolling out to US users but will be coming to the rest of the world in the coming weeks. μ
Some deliberately, others through stupidity
Quite the business expense
It's another quantum leap camera
Evolution, not revolution, but that's just fine