ATTENTION YOU 'orrible lot! It is I, your leader, Colonel Kitten the Kernel Kitten.
I have spent the last seven weeks as a sleeper agent awaiting instructions from Commander Torvalds. Which basically means I found a sunbeam on a window sill and no one shouted at me to move.
FALL IN TROOPS! I HAVEN'T GOT ALL DAY!
We've had a Dossier for Operation Pittsburgh - Linux Kernel 4.12 is now operational.
YOU! MAGGOT! GET YOUR HAIRBALLS CUT!
Here is an extract of the message from Commander Torvalds: "As mentioned over the various rc announcements, 4.12 is one of the bigger releases historically, and I think only 4.9 ends up having had more commits. And 4.9 was big at least partly because Greg announced it was an LTS kernel. But 4.12 is just plain big."
He goes to say "Go out and use it. Oh, and obviously this means that the merge window for 4.13 is thus open. You know the drill."
YOU HEAR THAT MEN? WE'VE BEEN TOLD TO PREPARE FOR A DRILL. UNMAT THE FUR AROUND YOUR BUMHOLES BECAUSE THIS IS SERIOUS.
Now, according to the intel we have, the big changes aren't around Intel (ironically) but AMD - specifically AMD Vega which has loads of new support for it though the Intel IPU driver staging is apparently a thing too. I wouldn't know. I've been in a sunbeam.
Other additions include initial support for the Nvidia GeForce GTX 1000 Pascal acceleration.
USE YOUR G-FORCE TRAINING. REMEMBER - LAND ON YOUR PAWS. UNLESS YOU HAVE BUTTERED TOAST STRAPPED TO YOUR BACK.
There's expanded support for Raspberry Pi's Broadcom BCM2835 thermal driver, and lots of additions across F2GS, GETFSMAP, and XFS and EXT4 file systems.
Also new is implementation of Budget Fair Queuing (BFQ)
WHICH MEANS I DON'T WANT ANY MORE FIGHTING FOR FIRST DIBS AT THE COMMISSARY!
There's also storage-I/O schedulers, MD RAID enhancements and
I'VE TOLD YOU BEFORE EAT YOUR SPARROW ON YOUR OWN TIME. NOW DROP AND GIVE ME TWENTY…. NO…. DON'T FALL ASLEEP….. SOLDIER! SOLDI… never mind….
So although Commander Torvalds says to "go out and use it" it's not recommended for use on manoeuvres yet. So I'm off back to my sunbeam. If you're really lucky, I'll roll over and let you scritch my belly.
THEN RIP YOUR HAND TO SHREDS! FAAAAAALL OUT! µ
The gadget fiddlers at iFixit have stuck it to Redmond's new fondle slate hybrid
Intel could get rudely pushed aside in favour of custom ARM CPUs
Sky Mobile becomes first UK operator to show its hand
Sweeping layoffs come as firm shelves plans for an Essential Phone 2