FORGET IT PEOPLE, by the time you have learned to play the ancient Chinese boardgame called Go, AI will already be in a position to wear you for shoes and we will be well under the cosh of our new shiny overlords.
In case you missed it, Google has become rather obsessed with making a beast that can beat people at Go, and the good news for it is that it is finally in a position to claim that its machine is the best in the world.
After a battle royale of sorts this week AlphaGo stands triumphant against pathetic humanity. Or at least one dude. A teenager called Ke Jie, who was the world champion and who may have been the envy of all his friends until Google and its AI beat him like a dusty carpet by winning two out of three games in a battle organised by Google and people who like Go. This makes us quail on our sofa, glare at Google's search box and cancel ay plans to adopt that Nest business.
Google's Demis Hassabis, was gracious over the win and on Twitter, suggesting that humanity had put on a good show against superior technology.
#AlphaGo wins game 2. What an amazing and complex game! Ke Jie pushed AlphaGo right to the limit.— Demis Hassabis (@demishassabis) May 25, 2017
Go is not easy to play so it might be best left to the robots and the AI out there, it is so complicated it may take their minds off us tearing our heads off and using our bodies as vessels for whatever waste they produce.
Some people are world-renowned experts at it and have been crowned as such. Their time is over though because both Facebook and Google have managed to make tin boxes that can play it better.
We thought Lee Sodel was the greatest Go player in the world, and put up the posters on our bedroom wall to celebrate it. It turns out that Ke Jie is our actual man, and that while he is better than us meat and bone sacks, he cannot touch Google's expensive brainbot.
Hassabis tweeted throughout the first game saying that the human was doing well at times and did play a close match.
It was Hassabis that took Deepmind to China to make a mockery of people, and he and the local Go Association and government colluded on the bland battle royale that was known as "The Future of Go Summit." This has been preserved online already. Hassabis reckons that it is good for the game, we reckon we will stick with our wordsearches and table tennis.
Game went to a count. #AlphaGo won by just half a point, the closest margin possible. Ke Jie played a great game.— Demis Hassabis (@demishassabis) May 23, 2017
"Just over a year ago, we saw a major milestone in the field of artificial intelligence: DeepMind's AlphaGo took on and defeated one of the world's top Go players, the legendary Lee Sedol. Even then, we had no idea how this moment would affect the 3,000 year old game of Go and the growing global community of devotees to this beautiful board game. Instead of diminishing the game, as some feared, artificial intelligence (A.I.) has actually made human players stronger and more creative," he said.
"It's humbling to see how pros and amateurs alike, who have pored over every detail of AlphaGo's innovative game play, have actually learned new knowledge and strategies about perhaps the most studied and contemplated game in history."
Our advice, if you ever find yourself in a betting over Go situation is always back the bot. Then get out of there and try and work out what you are doing with your life. µ
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