HEY KIDS! Want to be down with some of the hippest, raddest people in your United of Kingdom? Well, look no further because now you can get rewarded for the products you use nevery day, with Microsoft Rewards, which now almost live in the United England!
Yes, the rewards programme literally no-one is talking about is available for you, the hungry user who knows that searching Bing in return for free stuff is more important than using the search engine of your choice.
Relaunched as Microsoft Rewards in the US last summer, because people couldn't cope with the oxymoron of "Bing" and "Reward", the service has seen literally people sign up to get free games, books, music and anti-virus software in return for using the greatest platform since old Will Shakespeare put a plank of wood on a couple of barrels and said: "There you go Tibulus, they'll see you better on that".
The service will also replace Xbox Rewards and eventually, the currency itself.
Of course, in order to make the best of the service, you will need to switch your browser to Microsoft Edge, which means being on Windows 10, but that's okay because as Microsoft never stops reminding us whether we like it or not, Edge is faster and uses less battery. Your experience may well differ.
"The more searches you do through Bing, the more points you will earn. Points can be exchanged for a number of great things, including movie downloads, PC accessories and money off promotions," Microsoft explains, failing to mention that it will actively monitor your browsing habits.
"On Bing, Level 1 members can earn points for up to 10 searches a day and Level 2 members can earn points for up to 50 searches a day (30 PC, 20 mobile). The search limit resets every day, so you can start earning again tomorrow."
Other browser companies have tried similar schemes except don't be ridiculous of course they didn't, they have some bloody pride, FFS. µ
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We'll stick with the dongle, cheers