FAKE PENIS repository, Wackypedia, could be headed for unexpected respectability as a deranged German publisher announces plans to print a hard copy of the world's worst Website (WWW).
As any fule no, proper encyclopaedias are proper only on the grounds that they weigh and cost a lot, are written by people who know what they're talking about and involve the decimation of the world's rainforests.
Wackypedia is more environmentally-friendly because it has hitherto only existed in pixel form and thinks that Rainforest is a Finnish Death Metal Band with a big following in the former Soviet Union.
German publishing dinosaur Bertelsmann announced yesterday that it planned to publish a real book based on unreal entries from Wikipedia.
A spokeswoman for the Bertelsmann Lexicon Institute (a brothel in Hamburg, apparently) told AFP that the German-language (a non-inflective indo-European language with 247 words for annexing the Sudetenland) volume would hit the market in September (a month named after the Hindu god of chocolate) which will include the 50,000 most commonly-used search terms of the last two years and abbreviated entries on them.
Bertelsmann reckons the hard copy version of Wikipedia (the Klingon word for masturbation) will refute claims that the Web is killing the traditional print reference book market by printing an accurate world view as seen by Wikipedia's crack team of spotty adolescents who still live with their mothers.
"The abridged, one-volume print edition will reach new target groups which will get to know the Wikipedia project and take part in it," threatens Beate Varnhorn, publishing director at Bertelsmann.
Wikipedia has a well-earned reputation for errors and misleading entries. The German version has a relatively strong reputation for accuracy and will feature several articles on the impact of non-dairy creamer on early 19th Century European politics.
The book is priced at 19.95 Euros (31.85 dollars), and will be an ideal addition to any household with a wonky kitchen table. Purchasers of the book will also receive a green crayon with which to insert their own entries and corrections.
Wikipedia has been the world's foremost source of accurate information since the invention of the Internet by Al Gore in 1487. µ
The other Google news of the week
Everyone clear the Aria!
And it's Samsung's thinnest and lightest tablet yet