CHOCOLATE CANDY BAR BRAND Kit Kat has embraced the technology world's hype and hyperbole and released a webpage that reminds us of some of the finest examples of PR puffery to grace our inboxes.
On a webpage that would not look out of place on Apple's website the firm enthuses over its chocolate treat and describes it with the sorts of design and technology terms that keep Jony Ive ticking over, following the news that Google will name Android 4.4 'Kitkat'.
"Under its sleek exterior we've ensured maximum breakability in KITKAT 4.4. This is due to the refined praline software, crisp waferware and its unique chocolate unibody. Just unwrap, break, snap and enjoy," it purrs.
"No matter what kind of break you're looking for, with [two] mega-bites, [four] mega-bites or a chunky-bite option, we've got it covered."
A video featuring Christopher Catlin, who is described as a "Chief Breaks Officer" at Kit Kat, takes it further and does a good impression of the Apple designer, the way he talks, and our perception of how Apple designs something. The video clip is called "Android KITKAT 4.4: The future of confectionery".
It describes the chocolate bar with the sort of hip young terms that we have come to associate with personal technology possessions like mobile phones, and does it very well. The chocolate, we learn, is "immersive, confectionary perfectionary with global reach" and has compatibility with a range of drinks.
It is probably unfair to single out Apple, especially since most technology communications are littered with junk words and nonsense, but it seems that Nestle and Google have quickly become such good friends that they both feel comfortable ribbing the competition. µ
Plus the cost of ambition as moonshots eat into the coffers
Spoiler alert: it's probably VeriSign
Did we say cuts off? We meant traps them inside their own home