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GPS Jesus nabs thief

Plastic son of God defended by satellite angels
Friday, 28 December 2007, 14:09

NICKING a baby Jesus from his Christmas crib landed one Florida teen in divine and legal hotwater.

Danielle Santino, 18, from Wellington thought it would be a wizard wheeze to take the model of the baby Jesus from its crib.

Unfortunately for Santino, the baby was loaded with GPS tracking gear, as the son of God often is these days.

Inspector Knacker of the Wellington Yard, used the tracking system to find the baby Jesus in a house. There was no evidence of cattle a lowing around the house and the coppers had got their before the three wise men.

After coppers returned the infant to its crib, Santino turned up at the cop shop to confess. But alas confession and repenting is not enough in Florida as the state has some quaint methods of dealing with people who steal Messiahs.

Santino was charged with grand theft, which means that the stolen property, in this case a plastic doll, has to have a high value. Since the symbolic representative of the Christian deity has considerable value to many US Christians she might be lucky to get away with crucifixion, for a first offence.

More here. µ

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Comments
Price of Jesus

The doll was probably less than $50. The onboard GPS tracker was probably what bumped the price up to $1000 (base price for a LoJack unit is $700/£350).

posted by : ed3, 28 December 2007 Complain about this comment
divine hotwater?

No he is in legal hotwater, if he came forward and confessed and returned the stolen property then he has only the consequences to pay, which should be less considering his return of the property and confession.

What was stolen is not the crime, that he stole is, a theif is a theif no matter what he steals. Of course the government has a diff view, as Grand theft comes with a bigger sentence than petty theft.
I think community service (like working at the chuches soup kitchen) would be the perfect sentence.

posted by : Bryan, 28 December 2007 Complain about this comment
stupid fat idiot

if you want to tell her your thoughts, her myspace is, myspace.com/justdani

posted by : annonymous, 28 December 2007 Complain about this comment
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