INQhack survives Vistability test in Volesville

PARDON ME IF YOU WILL for any underlying tone of bitterness or similar sentiments, but I am heavily jetlagged, not to mention hungover, having arrived back from Microsoft's Seattle headquarters after a quick Q+A and a three-day press release. ( Sic. News Ed.)

The Vole supposedly invited The INQ over for tea because we are notorious "Microsoft doubters" - and we were accompanied by other supposed Vole doubters such as the folk from lifehacker and a very nice man from Slashdot, as well as some Microsoft MvPs. For those not clued up on the Volish Inner Circle, that means "Most Valued Professional". There were about eight of us, total.

After flying into Seattle economy (thanks Microsoft!) and given a chance to recuperate with a bit of kip, it was time to start. At seven in the morning. First up was security on the Vista thing, where we were assured that it's all very very good and that Sophos are a bunch of liars. The security chap bragged that he's got fourteen years of experience, and it's all been poured into making Vista a top-notch piece of kit and that the Vole is trying its very best to make sure there aren't too many security flaws. One has to wonder, though, if the man responsible for fourteen years of Microvole security can be trusted...

Next up, in a seemingly unrelated but humorous speech given by community affairs senior manager Jane Meseck, the INQ was told that Microsoft is a very nice company and that it helps out all sorts of poor communities, as well as helping out with disaster response and the like. Blah, blah. Her cohort, nPower lady Jaime Green went on to talk about nPower's relationship with Vole and all the good the two do for non-government organisations. We asked if there were any NGOs that nPower would not assist, and were kind of shooed off. Though porno webmasters have been known to help out with the scheme, remarks Lady Green.

Okay, okay, that's all very nice, but we wanted to hear about Vista. The INQ was told that XP has until 2011 until it kicks the bucket, but the upgrade is very much worthwhile, especially if you've got deep pockets. Gamers may rejoice, or moan, depending on their computer's Vistability, because Direct X 10 shall be Vista-only spake the Vole. As well as Halo 2. F.E.A.R., Oblivion and the latest flight simulator all looked extremely shiny and dazzling, but then they were running on top notch Alienware boxes. Speaking of Direct X, version 9 runs permanently while Vista's up and running for smoothness and shiny video goodness, while Direct X 10 kicks into gear when you're gaming.

Vista's gaming abilities are being pushed and are being tied in with Microsoft's Xbox 360, it would seem - the Vole is aiming to standardise the 360 controller with Windows games. Another interesting little tidbit that's Vista standard is the ability to block out violent games from yer young'ns, using more high-tech methods than the old hide-it-in-the-cupboard-at-the-top technique. Games ratings are shown in the Windows folder, and users have the ability to filter out games that contain violence, drug references, gore, and all of that other fun stuff that makes gaming worthwhile.

Aside from gaming, what else makes Vista worth the extra moolah? Shanen J Boettcher, Vole Extraordinaire, was keen to list off all sorts of "innovations" in Vista. There's an integrated search feature on the OS which does seem much improved from the XP's annoying little orange dog. Wizards seem somewhat more helpful, too - guiding you through the process of whatever it is you fancy doing. Help and support has been improved on, and supplies users with guided tours that show you exactly what it is you need to do. Innovative? Perhaps not, but it's certainly an improvement.

As a sidenote, here's the INQ on a Vista machine. And here is what it looks like when you set The INQ as a homepage on a Vista machine.

New Microvole Tyler Welch greeted us all the next day to show us some more of Vista's gaming doodads, as well as flashing around the Vole's shiny iPod contender, the Zune. Many DRM questions were asked, but most interestingly, we pressed him to admit that yes, he has pirated music online. Now, now, that's doing no favours for the Zune marketplace is it, Tyler?

By far most worthwhile of the trip was galavanting around Microsoft's campus and gleefully dropping fag ash all over the place, to show my contempt for all of those reinstalls I've had to do. Seeing the inner workings of Microsoft really was something else. For example, on a restricted wallchart within building 33, we took note of the average Vole worker's schedule:

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P.s., a special mention for chick magnet and Slashdotter Robin Miller who was not afraid to ask some tough questions, or mind particularly when I bummed his cigarettes.