Buzzword Survivor is most evil contest on earth

DEFCON IS NOW home to the most sadistic competition on earth, called Buzzword Survivor. If you think US reality TV is bad, not to mention Japanese game shows, they are nothing.

Buzzword Survivor is graciously brought to you by Configuresoft, a company that does enterprise management and lean IT type software. Boring shit to be sure. Lots of it as well, but it does have a purpose in the enterprise. No one, not even those who sell it will call it exciting and fun, and the only person who enjoys using it in his free time has had his medication adjusted and is now back to more socially accepted pastimes involving knives.

Back to the contest, there are eight victims, all of which compete for a share of $5000. To do this, they have to sit through 30 hours of vendor pitches about enterprise dashboard software, data graphing options, and XML methodologies. 17 minutes is enough to make most people seriously contemplate biting off their tongue and swallowing it to avoid the pain.

They look excited

Could it get worse? Sure. You not only have to sit there and contemplate your navel, but you have to pay attention. You will notice the three brave individuals all staring at the screen and taking notes. This is because after each pitch, there is a test, and your score determines your cut of the money. Evil. Evil evil evil.

Need a bathroom break or a nap? Leave any time you want, but you might miss an answer. Your call. Evil. Really. Vendor pitches for 30 hours. Forcing people to pay attention. Ouch. Our hat is tipped to the sadists at Configuresoft, they really came up with the most twisted contest on earth. Japanese TV could learn a lot from them. µ