This week in Hermit's Cave

P45 Candidates CUPID_STUNT, SKAFFMAN, NEWORIGINAL, FRNHT451, TAMEALIEN.
FNGs Praise Zegna, COELURUS, M1KE_BAKER, S390, DADDY00
Word of the Week Ad hominem
Identical twin Russian hookers surgically altered to look like Barbie? You'll love it... (NEWORIGINAL)

A TRULY MOMENTOUS WEEK this one, a week that will live in history for as long as smartalec timewasters gather in one place and shout tenuously related words at each other. That's right, this week the Word Association thread reached and surpassed 10,000 words. The BBC were going to dedicate a few days to celebrating this achievement, but the Queen's jubilee kinda messed that idea up. Anyway, Bonanza (for it was he) wins a free Inq t-shirt, which I would imagine he'll be framing to show to his grandchildren. The 10,000th word was 'down', in case the Kabbalaists out there are interested.

World Cup
the Cave is usually mercifully free from sports-talk (except for SGF and SDMAHANEY occasionally talking about baseball, but that's not proper sport), but the anticipated excitement in Japan this summer has got most of us rolling our t-shirts up over beer bellies and shouting 'Ing-ur-lund' with very little resistance. There wasn't much proper football talk, which is a good thing, the interest being more focused on betting and how to fleece colleagues. Frnht got us onto the subject of breadmakers after a while, which was much more interesting - he reckons he makes a tasty pizza, which will be useful to know next time I'm in the werewolf-infested wilds of Scotland and feeling peckish for some mozzarellay goodness. There was some interesting discussion of breads, bakeries and where to buy specialty flours until Kenmac and Josh embarrassed everyone into silence with an outrageous and rather unpleasant episode of lewd flirting. I can only hope they were drunk.

Where's the worst place to live?
Talk of home improvements and DIY led by our own ginger Lawrence Llewellyn Bowen, Mr G. He wanted to sand his walls because they were covered in lumpy bits - waaaah - but the thread finished up as quite a few did this week, with Mr G being beastly to Josh. Looks like hunting season has started early this year. Sid suggested that Mr G use wood panelling as a wall covering - he's reminding me more and more of Dennis Leary, with his wood panelling and rejection of all non-meat based foods...

Star Wars EpII
This thread danced around a bit this week. Try to imagine Mad Larry Ellison in a Mikado costume, flitting coquettishly between tables in a Marseilles stripjoint with a ricepaper fan - it was like that. There was the tail end of last week's mockery of Dubya, leading into a return to the topic of the Attack of the Clowns and the undisputed loveliness of Natalie Portman (if there's one thing we can usually agree on, it's totty). There was also some talk of recent videos, which spilt over into another thread...I think. Maybe I dreamt the rest of it, it wouldn't be the first time.

Vulture Central SETI team disappears!!
The elusive Mike Baker (of 'WTF is Mike Baker?' fame) made his return this week, bringing up a story over at The Site That Shall Not Be Named reporting the loss of their Seti@home team, last seen being led into a back room by a certain Dr Spinola uttering the words 'of course I can introduce you to Andrew Grove, sweetbuns'. Spinola swears innocence and says that he's lost the password so had no way of dissolving the group, and I suppose we're all going to have to rely on his famed journalistic integrity. For the last week or two, Sid has been boasting about his new toy - a Guinness keg in his house. He's even gone so far as to post photos of the beast, despite it being the only item he owns that isn't pink, and has been regaling us all with stories of how he's been drinking lots of the Devil's Buttermilk on tap in the comfort of his own home (despite it being well known that real beer only comes from casks). So it was with an archly raised eyebrow this week that we observed him asking, somewhat sheepishly, whether Guinness is a laxative. It might be a good idea to avoid New Hampshire for a while, folks.

My Job Interview
The Striped-Arsed Badger had a job interview this week, in which he actually admitted to the interviewers that he posts in the Cave. Yes, that was our reaction too. It's one thing to say blithely that you 'contribute to various techno-savvy cutting edge research groups', but to actually name the beast! He's been very restrained since then, presumably conscious of his every word being examined and recorded by potential employers - and if the interviewers are reading this, I can assure you that Tig is a good bloke who'll do well. I'd hire him, if I was hiring.

Microsoft Naming Conventions
Some irritable git whingeing about nothing in particular. Nothing to see here.

Osprey Smosprey
It's gone almost unnoticed amongst the traditional Kars, Kats and Guns, but the Cave has far more than it's fair share of avaition geeks.This thread was started by Kenmac so we know he's one, and TCB has been known to talk planes in far too much detail as well. SDMAHANEY can be relied on to join in anything engineering-related with gay abandon so there were no surprises there. It seems relatively benign for now, but needs watching. When phrases like 'bit of jet nozzling for control effort' are bandied about with no shame, we know that we're teetering on the edge of an abyss. And I just *hate* teetering.

From the Hermitage:
From: Hermit at hoodview (HOODVIEW) [HOODVIEW] 1-Jul 00:55
To: Flashman (THEFLASHMAN)

I run the fluffy bunny appreciation club in my locality. Ifn it weren't for those fluffy bunnies we'd have to start eradicating other things. Politicians, lawyers, hippies, furreners, politicians and more furreners. I'm akshullee peese a luving peeple. Long as it's my piece and my luvun.
Hermit
D. Martin

From: Hermit at hoodview (HOODVIEW) [HOODVIEW] 30-Jun 03:36
To: SDMAHANEY

Sell! Sell!!!!
I seem to remember at the "other place" when ever Mike said anything good about any product the stocks went all to hell. Might want to rethink that bit about kind words.....
Hermit
D. Martin
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