Taxi drivers find corpses, PCs, phones in back of cab

A SURVEY OF taxi drivers showed that people are losing their mobile phones, their PDAs, their notebooks, and even their lives in the back of cabs, worldwide.

According to Pointsec, which surveyed 900 licensed cabbies in London, Sydney, Paris, Munich, Oslo, Helsinki, Stockholm, Copenhagen and Chicago, one driver turned round to find his passenger dead.

Other cabbies have found passengers' false teeth and their artificial limbs in the back of their vehicles.

The firm claimed that Jemima Khan left her iPod and mobile phone in a black cab, but the cabbie called her friend, who turned out to be someone called Hugh Grant.

The survey claimed to show that in the last six months, drivers of London's black cab unearthed 63,135 mobile phones, 5,838 Pocket PCs, and 4,973 notebooks.

The London survey was conducted by the Licensed Taxi Drivers Association, Taxi. But Pointsec claimed that an average of 80% of passengers were re-united with their mobiles after the cabbies tracked down their owners.

Said Sid Spinola (licensed cab driver 666): "I had this bird in the back of my cab once. She was singing like a canary. In fact she was a canary. Would you Adam and Eve it? In my opinion, hanging's too good for them. What you say guv? The Savoy? Where's that? Ah yes, that'll be 5,000 quid. No we don't accept f*#@#$@ Euros. Bloody Europe. Need a receipt for that? That Michael Howard, he's a scream, eh? I had that Ken Livingstone in the back of my cab once, he's a droll geezer, init? That Tony Blair what a complete w.... [continued story 25000]" µ

* With apologies to Private Eye).

L'INQ
Pointsec