Microsoft makes Robots

MICROSOFT HAS moved one step closer to becoming Douglas Adam's Sirius Cybernetics Corporation by making public its own robotics division and releasing development code for programming "your plastic pals who are fun to be with".

The Sirus Cybernetics Corporation was Adam's megalithic IT company whose marketing division occupied several solar systems.

General manager of the Microsoft Robotics Group, Tandy Trower (no really) says that Microsoft wants to have its products in place by the time the market takes off in three to five years time.

This week the division has released its first bit of software the Microsoft Robotics Studio which aims to create common technological standards in the industry. A spokesVole said that it's intended for use with a wide range of robots although it runs on Windows.

Trower said that Vole believes robotics could present a big opportunity as the market grows and consumer robotics alone will grow into a multibillion-dollar industry in five to 10 years.

Vole hopes that its considerable influence and marketing ability will help the development of software for Robots. But the whole thing is starting to make Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy appear like prophecy.

Next Microsoft will develop robots with genuine people personalities, its marketing division will adopt the logo "Share and Enjoy", produce robots which have pains in the diodes down their left side, and be first against a wall when the revolution comes. It is all so depressing, don't talk to me about life.

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