Orange lures hacks with diet of worms

MOBILE PHONE OPERATOR Orange lured a pack of hacks into a sweatbox of an orifice and fed them worms yesterday, in an attempt to get them to write nice things about its mobile phone services.

Having been channelled into a steamy room, where the word 'Try' was writ large above a podium, assembled journalists were left to guess what the text message point of all this was.

The selection of meeters and greeters Orange had assembled didn't clarify things. There was a group of masseurs, various assorted babes (Harvey Nichols' perfume counter must have been staffless that day) and a woman who kept juggling for no apparent reason. Nor was it clear why people kept offering us weird meals like Meal Worms in Chocolate. It was all related to the theme, apparently, which was 'Try'.

Try what? Try dropping your prices Orange? Try turning the heating down at your press events? Or try giving out sweatbands? Try assembling some less rickety tables next time?

No. The 'Try' campaign is Orange's strategy to break the 'vicious circle' holding back the adoption of technology by businesses, apparently.

Orange's answer is to offer said businesses all kinds of services free, for a month. Like Line 2 (which is basically a second line on your business mobile) and conferencing. (As if phone conferences on fixed lines weren't bad enough. A five person conference on mobile phones would make voting time at the Eurovision song contest look cohesive.) It's also offering the Mobile Office Card and Orange World free for a month.

Try: something new? No, it's just like those free offers you get on magazine and Internet subscriptions, that can cost you an arm and a leg, if you're not careful. Try and remember to cancel it.

Try. That's cute. Next year Orange can run a follow up campaign called Try Harder. (Note to Orange marketing department. We'll be billing you for that idea). µ