Treasures from Hermit's Cave

Top Time-wasters: TCB500, NEWORIGINAL, CUPID_STUNT, SKAFFMAN, THEFLASHMAN, FRNHT451, TAMEALIEN, BOB_DINOSAUR, BO_NANZA, SIDVISCOUS

FNGs: RAVEN, EVILADM1N and a couple of imposters.

Spring is here. The bluebells in my garden are temporarily outnumbering the weeds, April showers are conspiring with the April sun to give the world an optimistic sparkle, the gardens of suburbia are filled with the sound of lawnmowers and snapping bedsheets. And in the Cave, are we rising to the season, full of new life and the first whiff of good times? Is the sap rising in our furry veins? No. We're debating the grammar of British ship-naming tradition. Not content with the usual pedantry that occurs when geeks gather, we've really hit new lows. The principle culprits were Cupid, e-Kenmac and Sid, who should all know better. Except Cupid, maybe.

Anti-terrorist stuff Lawsuit seeking Reparations for Slavery
This one was fun - a short-lived but enjoyable burst of haiku got our creative juices going and even survived e-Kenmac's attempts to turn it into a mucky limerick thread, probably because NewOriginal's haiku were more than lewd enough. OOFG April
Another high-volume thread this week. A surprising amount of it was actually on the topic of this month's OOFG, but there was also discussion of vampires, Frnht's new motherboard and the weather in various regions of the US - SGF2 and SDMAHANEY have been discussing the weather a lot lately, and it always seems to be snowing for one of them. That's probably the cause of SGF's sudden influx of outdoor critters - they're coming in to get out of the cold.

The infamous Scooter was raised a few times this week - it seems as if Sid is actually becoming quite fond of the thing, and even believes it to be a bit of a babe-magnet. I suppose that after driving a pink truck for the last couple of months, anything would seem that way. Somewhere along the way Rotoplooker and NewOriginal chickened out of the OOFG, one with back pain the other with ‘generalised non-specific wussiness'. (I actually made it down to London for this one and was able to see the event in all it's glory thanks to Mr G's kind offer of accommodation, and I have to say it was a very pleasant way to pass an evening - fun for all the family, and probably approved by the Disney Corporation in terms of good healthy wholesomeness). There was some good-natured cattiness between Spinola and Mad Mike Mageek over the ownership of the now-famous bottle of whisky, and discussion of the US Government's understandable attempts to keep Spinola out of the country, or at least on a tight leash while he's on their soil.

Kars [isn't that in Asia? Ed.]
More talk of the Scooter, with a disturbing focus on optional sun parasols for it. Sid is starting to worry me - the Scooter, the pink truck, the chinos….there's a pattern emerging here and I'm not sure I like it.

Apache & PHP help
Promethea was asking for some help with … well, getting Apache and PHP going. Like a good gaggle of geeks we all leapt to his aid with a great sucking of teeth and ‘oooh, you don't want to do that's. This was followed, logically enough, by some discussion of the homoeroticism in American team sports and their fondness for wearing tight knickerbockers.

Indian giver
This started as yet another link to a Middle East news story (does anyone here do anything but read online newspapers?), before lurching it's way to Nobel prizes and then, via MrsTCB's comment about the laxative qualities of iron supplements, an always-welcome round of Pythonesque ‘only had one shoe had to eat soil' Yorkshireness. The frivolity didn't last however, and TCB's recurring obsession with the behaviour of Delphi's links once again reared it's head.

Mac masochists
NewOriginal revealed that he isn't just a sourfaced curmudgeon on this forum, but he spreads it around the ‘net with unusual generosity. The target of his withering sarcasm in this case was a Mac user on a Jag forum, so the rest of the world can only applaud his efforts to cull these floating elastoplasts in the gene pool. This set the scene for a bit of Mac-baiting, always a welcome pastime in the Cave, and a few links to humourous Mac jokes were posted.

Hermit's Quotables:
From: Hermit at Kavewest ) [HOODVIEW] 8-Aug 21:43 To: Flashman (THEFLASHMAN)

*** Dolphins, eskimos - it's all a bunch of tree-hugging hippy crap. Don't know about the trees stuff but I've hugged a couple of awful good looking Eskimos in my time. Dolphins now, that's a bit far out.

Guess they're good for steaks and roasts though. Tree hugging is kinda passe now. They build tree houses and string rope walks between trees. Still use the hippy type names though and most seem to be well eddykated, sincere, motivated young peeple. Yup.

Screensavers is art!
The Hermit

From: Hermit (HOODVIEW) [HOODVIEW] 2-Oct 21:03
To: sdm (SDMAHANEY)

H#ll I've tried em both. Sanity brings depression, expectations and religion. A touch of lunacy give one the freedom to say to h#ll with it and get on with life....

Eschew Obfuscation
The Hermit

Flashman, my 2p worth.

'What we have here….is fail'yure to c'moonikate'