If this Reverend in in fact blessing Iphones, is this not a form of sacrilege?

After all, Saint Steven has already personally blessed all these gizmos with His Holy Powers. Kind of like pressing an elevator button twice (but with religions, is this not generally frowned upon?).

Why can't they just dispense with the Reverend entirely, and just form a kind of "lego idol" of Saint Steve by piling up the Iphones? I am sure that this would work similarly to an atomic pile, and the critical mass achieved by several hundred of the shiny trinkets would beam out intense "Jobs Rays", igniting the congregation to intense heights of religious rapture.

the internet also moves in mysterious ways!

i'll have to write a book all about it where every sentence begins with 'and'

Oh God, would you please raise my download speed and keep the bad packets at bay?

Amem!

and the internet's prophet is google. you can ask him anything and you always get a straight answer - unlike in church where you are answered with another question, or vague superstition, or guilt, or fear, or hypocricy ad infinitum

Now it is certain that God has been identified to be one and the same as the Almighty Internet. It is everywhere and you cannot put your finger on it. It is singular and plural at the same time. It cannot be destroyed. Yes, we've found God. And, when it's gadgets are blessed, then the interconnecting medium must definitely be God {him,her,it}self.

Blessed are thee Almighty Internet! Let my church earn your trust and blessings. Do not crash the operating system, oh dear. Blessed are all enabled gadgets; without I could not worship you. Forgive us all our porn and supply us with some more. Amen.

that invalidates all MS licenses?

next it'll be a pile of m15's and kalachnakovs.

tools of our trade - humbug!