...tryin' to save a quarter...

Seems like he hasn't learned much in there anyway. No loss then.
Besides, he can always bask in the EM radiation of his monitor, downloading pr0n on the intarweb thingy.

Why, do you know there were plans to fluoridate ice cream... Children's Ice Cream?

These are the same people who are made ill by the addition of fluoride to water.

Why even go outside? Maybe these technophobes can live out their lives in faraday-caged concrete bunkers to keep out the radio waves. Good riddance. At least they won't be using up more bandwidth.