Civility and diplomacy are excellent grounds for matching unknowns but when you have a hole, there will be a ball or else there is no meaning to existence. A soiled pair of socks will find its rightful admirer otherwise pheromones will not exist. Which goes to show that “having” or “not-having” is not the point. The point is, why have anything. Sooner or later, people will have to uncover [an not “discover” as saviours are prone to declare] why they exist or else they’ll merely be a ball or a hole. Unless you really are a soiled sock or a sniffer. “Well punk, do you feel like sniffing, well ……?”

Anyone for a bit of XL memorabilia, I have a West Ham shirt, with XL Holidays across the front. Starting offers of £500 going quickly, you cant buy them in the club shop anymore.