The bloody Home Office were also not amused and said us cabbies 'ave no royal perogative ter flout the chuffin' lor. I’ll tell yer wot the bloomin' real knowledge is fer nuffin': these HO gumshoes are driving us cabbies dahn the Tudorbethan paff. It's tain't meats ter have prim and proper 3-point British restraints; but we must safe guard the info of rippers wotever The bleedin' Home Office is currently jugglin'. The message ter fares is clear. They are welcome ter hail a Black Cabs over 'ere 2 Lundun oright mate, (one never knows the 'rahd's gorn mayd') an we'll leave a light on for yer 'cuz We accept: Godivas, Monkeys, Ponies, Edges, Carpets and Visa or MasterCard but not a septic tank Express or Travelcard will do or you gonna spend a penny, and the Prime Minister will invite us all round for tea evry time 'e visits. Cor blimey guv! But don't dare tellin' a joke because livin' in the UK is no laughin' matter, and tie you mobile to yer umbrella because yor not as likely ter be forgettin' that! Granted, all Cabbie hacks aren’t Cockneys - but every true Cockney is an Eastender. Wunners why we don't cop more apologies from those coppers?! "Fud is fud is fud," says an 'umorless spokeslass! It's time ter please slew don, and Blimey! You want a Form VAT 407 and you aim to go all the way to Whales? Oright guvner, we'll be neck-and-neck trendy afore you can say "the code is clear!"

"The report goes on to say that one cabby found false teeth, artificial limbs, condoms and bras on his back seat.
Hopefully not all from the same fare"

Heather Mills does tend to like the older man after all...