Sat 22 Nov 2008

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Edited by Paul Hales

Published by Incisive Media Investments Ltd.

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The INQ apologises to Microsoft

Who dares Windows

FOLLOWING A STORY The INQUIRER ran last week, we have received a number of complaints. Since these are from serious people, who drive company cars and use words like paradigm shift, and not just common techies, we feel we must treat these complaints in all seriousness.

So The Inquirer would sincerely like to apologise for the content of the story entitled Trident ends tear-jerking Windows scenes in picture houses.

A complaint was made by Elaine Hodson, Pr executive of www.neesham.co.uk, whose client Trident was not happy with the technical content of the story. Hodson also suggested that Microsoft had voiced similar grievances. Being sensitive creatures, Microsoft may have preferred to hide behind the skirts of Hodson and Neesham PR.

After a thorough internal inquiry, it has emerged that The INQ allowed itself to run a questionable story. The piece suggested Embedded Windows has a lot of useful commercial applications, an implication we are happy to withdraw.

We are also sorry if we suggested that Embedded Windows may be so powerful that ordinary users might find it hard to configure. A concept that Trident thought too controversial and painful for public airing.

We understand this not to be the case. We are genuinely sorry if we implied that Surrey based IT distributor Trident might want to make life easier for its clients. If that is not so, we are only too pleased to put the record straight.

Neesham, Trident and Microsoft can now rest assured that will never try to suggest, even in jest, that any of them are in any way interesting and approachable, and willing to help simplify technology.

You won’t be reading about Microsoft any more. Honest. µ

Comments

Damned if you do...

So glad to hear that you won't be running any more stories about Microsoft.

Will you be auctioning off Inq office supplies now that you're out of business?
posted by : khan, 27 August 2008

It is was only true

We will be glad never to hear about Microsoft here anymore. You seem to have an perpetual ax to grind against MS. it is beyond boring, even the US National Inquirer (a known piece of garbage) has a better journalistic etiquette and is getting a bad name because of you. Did Microsoft turn you down for a job? Did they refuse to give you free software? Did they hurt your feeling when you were little? Whatever the problem was, deal with it, grow up and move on. you continual ranting against MS is so out there that you are actually producing the opposite effect on the readers, even those not particularly favorable to MS.

posted by : Alan M, 27 August 2008

Hear Hear!!

-pounding table with glee-

:b
posted by : Captain Obvious, 27 August 2008

Dear Mr. Booth et. al.,

You needn't expect knee-jerk kickbacks from me. I would be a sham to be given over to such a rebate mind. Everyday I read The INQUIRER, hoping that some bloke such as your self has left me a bread crumb for which I fall to my kneeshams and give thanks for morsells to come. From http://www.neesham.co.uk/documents/NeeshamCompanyBrochure-noclients.pdf
and I quoth: "Elaine Hodson, as an Account Executive [sic (with capitals)] working directly with editors and clients [ {also} sic (without capitals)], she continues to impress with her energy and efficiency."
Shorely, Mr. Booth, you being a patron of the arts, should recognise it's 'The End' for popcorn at the movies. We know that it is, because the Guardian tells us so: http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2008/aug/10/foodanddrink1
I would suggest, Mr. Booth, that if you hope to butter your poppycock in the future, that you should take note of the Current Client List (capitals? yes, sure. why not?) listed as it were on page 11 of Neesham PRLtd's brochure [sited]. And in your future nights out on the cinema scenes, try to avoid they clientèle's sense and sensabities, so help your Tourette's, I do swear and where do I sign?
posted by : karlsbad Agin, 27 August 2008

Drashek Speaks:

As Your Adjutant General, Mr. Booth, I Do NOT Believe your Fingers Where Broken before this appogee.

Remember theINQ has one policy. Too Bad, Tough Luck & NO Way.

Changes: 1.) bring back Mike 2.) Make Paul President 3.) Make Syl My Mistress. END OF STORY.
drashek
posted by : theINQ, 27 August 2008

What, is INQ sorry for something?

OMG...
Mike come back!

posted by : mycelo, 27 August 2008

chuckling

I've never read a funnier apology! It's great writing like that, has details but leaves us laughing, which keeps us coming back for more!
posted by : joe, 27 August 2008

I didn't really get it

Anyway I thought trident was a kind of gum, or else the pokey thing the devil shakes at you for running Microsoft software.
???totally mystified???
I guess I'm sorry too, in a way... sorry about it chaps.
posted by : Grunchy, 27 August 2008

I know you are not sorry at all

[raskolnikov] [Orcish]: kek !!!
posted by : raskolnikov, 27 August 2008

All too true.

I just read your "Trident ends tear-jerking Windows scenes in picture houses." article. It is all too true. Speaking literally about what was written before, I have encountered many instances, where people cannot watch a bloody dvd on windows because of the DRM. A video codec installed "who knows when" causes Windows to think the video drivers need to be updated. I just install VLC player to prevent me having to charge customers unneeded money, which companies like Norton Protection 2003 "freshly renewed" will do.
posted by : Anthony, 28 August 2008

Funny...

Hahahaha, good one....bit early for Aprilfools, don't you think? :-)
posted by : Bas, 28 August 2008

like Shakespeare

That article read like Shakespeare, hard to understand but it sounded great. Nick hurt Microsoft's feelings, somebody please give him a medal!
posted by : Eric P., 28 August 2008

Creativity gone mad

Just read the previous article to which this one refers - someone (That's you Nick!) was obviously trying to be very 'creative' with the whole cinema thing - shame the article didn't really have any substance - maybe that's why they all complained. Maybe better to spend your time thinking your articles through. Bring back Mike!!!!! Big Issue time for you Nick. *** Meloquin

posted by : Meloquin, 28 August 2008

Good one

Best unpology I read for quite a while and I'm chortling to myself imagining Ms PR's face when she reads it.
posted by : Joe Harrison, 29 August 2008

awesome!

the inq just OWNED J00!
posted by : batch, 29 August 2008

it's the truth

Tell them to kiss your arse.
posted by : David, 31 August 2008

Thanks

You made my day. Thanks for that.

And don't take the negative comments above that serious since it's they job to write such things. Myself and the german tech-press I read so far does fully agree with your conclusion.
posted by : Sebastian, 31 August 2008

Awesomeness

Great article, laughed my pants off at the silly secretary lady and all the subject really. Nice way to kick them in the butt the second time.

I bet the secretary lady read this article and she concluded that Inq actually feels sorry, and she's satisfied now. Some people's brains just don't want to work, and the trouble is they have the loudest mouths around.

Microsoft hiding behind their skirts, heh heh.
posted by : the mtfr, 06 October 2008
IThound
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