Radio controlled male contraceptive developed
What could possibly go wrong?
AUSSIE boffins have developed a radio controlled contraceptive implant which can switch a cobber's flow of sperm on and off with the flick of a button.
According to New Scientist, a radio device is placed inside the duct which carries sperm from each testicle. When the off button is pressed the flow of sperm is stopped.
The device is a silicone-polymer valve which allows a set of conducting " fingers" to act as antennae and convert the signal's energy into sound waves that travel through the polymer and create stresses inside the device.
Team leader Said Al-Sarawi said that that the on-off button would be stored at your local doctors so that it would not be set off by mistake.
We would have thought this would mean that anyone within a 10 metre radius of a doctor's surgery, including the doctor, in they were male, might suddenly find themselves fertile. There is also the possibly that radio pulses from other devices might interfere with your testicles.
Apparently to fix this problem the device works like a car's remote key-fob with each valve responds only to a radio-frequency signal with a unique code. Given that these sometimes can be opened, we wouldn't fancy your chances if you take your testicles through an x-ray scanner at Heathrow.
More here. µ
Comments
remotes
Yet another remote control to lose down the back of the sofa. Just hope it isn't switched to "off" at the time.Ohh Yeahh
Methinks the days of playing Barry White to help the mood may be over. He used to get you laid, but now he makes you sterile.sounds like
socialismImprovement
How about putting a led on the device to know it's on-off state and give you a fertile "glow"wi-fi testicles
Well now that's something to add to that multi-device remotes.WiFi Testicules
Hmmm, remote controlled ‘vas deferens’ valves. I wonder can a second set of valves be installed on the vascular structures that control erectile functions.Hey, now we could have the best of both worlds! The doctor could keep the birth control button; we could keep the Mr. Happy button, ready for action at a moments notice!
It would take the guess work out of Viagra, would it not?
It would give a new meaning to, “He's on the button”.
SPARKS
Radio Head
What? Some blokes will be listening in on the chaps from blighty?Volley'd and thunder'd!
I want to own the remote control
I agree with the idea of the car door type thing, but there should be an LED attached to the thing, and the rule should ALWAYS be: If it's on, it's OFF, if it's off, it's ON.Honestly, who's the idiot who came up with the idea that when the device is doing it's job, it's off, but when it's just sitting there, it's on? Even if allowing the sperm uses up power, preventing the sperm should be referred to as on.